Ten Year Down a Twisting Road

We are the Maine-iest couple. That's the
Portland Lobster Co. in the background.

The Wife and I were talking about marriage the other day. Our marriage, specifically. As of this writing, it has been nine years, 363 days for us together. And it has been nine years, 362 days of surprises.

The love of our lives seems to
know she basically owns
our house.
I would love to have an appropriate story from that second day of marriage. That was the day we flew to Salt Lake City on a 7 a.m. Northwest Airlines flight. We went to our somewhat-ghetto apartment in somewhat-ghetto South Salt Lake. We napped. We might have watched a movie. I bought a digital camera for our honeymoon in Cabo San Lucas the next day. Yawn.

There are plenty of days in a marriage like that. Not only is life not always a thrill ride, it usually isn't thrilling.

Yet, somehow, after not-quite 10 years together, we look back and shake our heads.

"If I could show you everything that's happened over the past ten years," I said to TW, "What wouldn't surprise you?"

"Wow," TW said. "I guess that we're still married?"

Fair point. We are far too stubborn and committed to be anything but married. Other than that, I think our younger selves would be pretty wowed.

I couldn't have anticipated
how much I would love our
friends in Maine. And of course,
Slugger, the Sea Dog.
* We bought a house, realized we didn't like suburbia, and sold the house.
* We went to Peru. I had never left the country prior to getting married, so this one is hardly a given.
* TW skied mountains. Big, honest-to-God mountains.
* I got to work as a TV and radio reporter in addition to my job as a sports editor. I was just a copy editor when we got married.
* TW helped run a health coaching company.
* We moved five times. That's actually below my lifetime average.
* We quit our jobs and moved from Utah to Maine.
* We moved to Boston.
* We moved back to Maine.
(The moves all made sense at the time.)
* We bought a funky, modern condo in downtown Portland.
* I performed a legal, binding marriage for a couple of friends.
* TW is now Professor Patrick at the school she once attended.
* My cousin, whom I once changed diapers for as a live-in nanny, moved to Maine from Florida and loves it here. She was in elementary school and was a flower girl at our wedding.
* And of course, Daisy Duke came into our lives.

I'm running out of pictures with just TW and I in them.
It has been a long, wonderful trip. But not because everything has gone according plan. It's been great because we are so willing to change our plans. Living in Utah was fine, it was even pretty good, but it wasn't amazing. We wanted a life that is better than we thought possible. And we made it happen.

It did not just happen. TW took night classes for two years just so she could apply to graduate school. I worked extra, waking up at 5 a.m. to do TV news reports or volunteering for writing assignments just because I wanted more opportunities.

And it all paid off. We love where we are at. We love our friends in Maine. We love our families and that they visit us and keep us involved in their lives even though we don't live next door.
I am clearly running out
of ammunition.

Of course this was going to turn into a love fest. It's an anniversary post! It will be another 10 years before you have to read another, so hang in there.

Even with all that love, even though we like everything roughly the way it is, TW and I know one thing is for sure: Nothing is for sure. Things are always changing, even when you don't want them to change. We will make our plans, but we're well aware that God has his own plans and they aren't necessarily the same as our plans.

We have only one confirmed plan for our second decade together: We're driving to Quebec City to spend our anniversary on Thursday. We don't know where we're eating, we don't speak French and our car might explode in scenic Jackman, Maine, along the way. But we're planning to be in Quebec (and I'm hoping to buy a Nordiques hat; don't tell TW).

All we can do is make plans. And here, 10 years later, we're both just thankful for all the great plans we have made that brought us to this point.

I can't say much here to surprise TW (other than mention that I bought a new car for the trip to Canada!) because we simply talk about *everything*. When she's annoying me, we talk about it. When I'm annoying her, we talk about it (eventually). I don't believe there is a one-size-fits-all secret to marriage, but that's our secret to still loving each other after 10 years.

This much I can say with certainty: We will still be married 9 years and 363 days from now. I will still love her. She will still love me. The rest? I am simply excited about the mystery of what that 10 years holds for us.

Not mushy enough for you? You can read any one of my drippy love letters on other blogs.
Found one that isn't terrible!

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