Making Chicken Salad Out of ...

This is me doing Warrior II in our living room. Yes,
that's Peruvian art on the wall at left.
Some light reading for your Friday:

You know the feeling. You're trying to get out of town. There's a bunch of stuff to take care of. Meanwhile, the dog is essentially clinging to the ceiling. She jumps on the couch. Off the couch. On the couch. Off the couch.

She looks at you: Play With Me.

Fine. You're going to Camp Bow Wow, the place with live streaming web video of your dog rolling in other dogs' waste material. 'Cuz that's what she does.

It's hot out. Newsflash. Stop the presses. You fumble for a leash, her collar, a wallet, keys, cell phone, some cash for a yoga class and load up the car.

You pull into the lot. Front spot, right in front of the door. Perfect. It's 92 degrees and your dog is off leash in the parking lot. You grab her. Leash her up. Grab the wallet so you can pay. Shut the door. And remember your keys are still in the car. Along with your spare key.

Forty five minutes later, the locksmith shows up and unlocks your door (in exchange for $60). Semi-defeated, you go home. Those noon yoga classes? They've all started. You can't go. Wait a minute. The Internet. Youtube. There's gotta be some yoga videos on youtube!

And that's why the picture on top of this post is of me, doing Warrior II in our living room. Also, I ate at Kamasouptra. It was 96 out when I bought the soup. Steamy. Hot. Soup.

Comments

  1. David CorriveauJuly 22, 2011 at 6:35 AM

    After locking keys in car during Vermont boys soccer playoff game (Woodstock at Green Mountain Valley) in October of 1998, I started carrying two set of keys to EVERYTHING in separate pockets. No repeat performances since ...

    ReplyDelete
  2. JillJuly 26, 2011 at 7:34 PM

    Crap. I'm behind on the blog. Kamasouptra. 60-5-6.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Aw, Maaaaaaan

Image
Journalists aren't normal. You could say it takes a certain kind of person to be a journalist, but you'd be wrong. There's lots of different kinds of people who are journalists. It's just that they sometimes have more extreme personalities than you see in, say, the movie Office Space. That brings us to Dan Dickson, one of the few larger-than-life characters I have ever known. If you were to write a book about Dan, or perhaps a movie, his character would inevitably watered down by editors because nobody would ever find a character like him believable. Though I'm sure I'm mostly writing for an audience of a hundred or so Salt Lake Tribune employees who already know "The Danimal," it's important to pause here to talk about one of his most important personal characteristics, his voice. Dan's voice is a strange blend of cowboy Western accent and surfer-dude guy accent. Take The Dude from The Big Lebowski, make his voice a little more nasal, and add...
Read more

The Most Unlikely Couple ~ Part VI ~ Roman numerals: Yuck

Image
For those that missed them, here are Parts One , Two , Three , Four , and Five . Last one. Then, because I believe in the power of dreams, I'm going to take my shot at being a NASCAR driver and blog about it. Let me know if you need cigarettes or chewing tobacco. I lied to you. Right there in the final paragraph of Part V. I made it sound like, on a drive back from Los Angeles, I waited until Cedar City, Utah, to call Amy. Not true. First, I called her outside of Las Vegas. That call was just to satisfy the voice in my head saying, "Call Amy" over and over again. It was 9 a.m. Central Daylight Time. She was at work and I knew it. Voicemail. No need to leave a message. Done and done. She didn't have my Utah cell phone number. She would have no idea who had called. Take that, voice inside my head. Then, as previously mentioned, the voice got incessant. "Call Amy. Call Amy. Call Amy," it said. Fine, I decided in St. George, Utah. I'll wait until Cedar C...
Read more

The Most Unlikely Couple ~ Pt. V ~ Phantom!

Image
For those that missed them, here are Parts One , Two , Three and Four . Only two left (with an epilogue). Then, as suggested by a reader, I'm going to take up a Sister Wife , to promote more rom-com blog posts. So stay tuned for that. The canine weight loss plan. Available at www.petfinder.com Some people go into a tailspin after a breakup. To an extent, I fit that profile for a couple of months, but it turned into a wonderful positive. I lost all appetite. Which was actually great. I capitalized on the lack of appetite and joined a gym. I lost 40 pounds in three months. It helps that I had a spaz for a chocolate lab, named Duke. He is fondly remembered by our new puppy, Daisy. But you know that already. Something snapped in me when Amy and I broke up. I started eating right. I attended an awesome church in Duluth, The Vineyard . I started writing. I do that when I need an outlet. Perhaps you've noticed. Most important, I matured. Instead of wanting acceptance from wo...
Read more