The Reoccurring Theme

Dial X to exit PA school.

This happens every now and then. My phone dings with an alert. Somebody has commented on my blog! I click and read the comment. It's often our old neighbor or a former co-worker or two. We chat. We make jokes. Good times.

But every now and then it's somebody making a comment on a blog about how to survive PA school as a spouse.

It happened a while ago and I've still been processing the comment because it's so damn sad. Our anonymous reader/commenter sounds like he's at the end of his rope.

"I've never been more alone in my life, as the past 6 years has been every day spent with her. She's changed. My hope is she will come back after PA school is done. She's just not there," he wrote.

There was more. He tried to be funny, but mostly it was sad. He's worried their marriage won't last. Communication is impossible. They don't see each other much. It's familiar.

Every PA school spouse is nodding their heads right now. I can't think of a relationship that came through it unscathed.

It isn't *that* bad for the students. They will tell you they didn't realize it was so tough. They didn't realize it was so bad. Which seems kind of unbelievable when you're a spouse on the other side of it. We tried to express how bad it was, but even communicating major things can be difficult.

I can only offer two generic-sounding statements that a PA student spouse probably knows to be true: This will come to an end and things will get back to normal. And it will all be worth it. The Wife and I are saving for retirement (!), we live downtown, we have great friends, and we can live basically wherever we would like to live. TW described life to me the other day as "more than enough." We have more than enough. It gets better.

So tell you what. Go ahead, keep commenting on that post, this post, or wherever. Talk about it here. If you want to talk offline, send me a note. I communicate like a teenage girl, so you'll hear back from me. Hang in there.